I dislike my life. Not a question, a fact. Ignore the question mark?
Posted by adminJun 30
I dislike my life. I feel like if I said I “hate” my life, I’m being overdramatic. I know people have it way worse than me, and I respect that, unlike a lot of people. Half of this crap I’m about to complain about to complete strangers I have never told anyone, which is kind of why I love this. So, here it goes, the most bitc hin I’ve ever done in my life. See, my mom has been on drugs since I was tiny. I literally can remember in third grade knowing she was, unbelievable, but I knew what was up, I’m not/ wasn’t a dumba ss. Anyways, she got a DUI once, and she got a possession. But honestly, I was happy that she did. I didn’t/ don’t really like her. I’ll love her, she’s my mom, but I do not like her. Fight about everything, and on and on and on. All she wants in life is money, and I’m pretty sure the only reason she didn’t sell me for drugs is because I was a tax exempt. But anyways, my dad made me move in with him, which I liked because I absolutely love my dad. We never fight, we get along, and I love him so much. We’ll get back to this later. Unrelated note, I don’t think I’m the prettiest thing ever, but I’m not completely disgusting. I hang out with all the popular and beautiful people though. They like me because I’m funny if I do say so myself. But anyways, I have this friend, not a best best friend, not that awkward friend you semi know and only pretend to be excited to see when you notice them at the check out line in walmart. Her name is… let’s call her Gina. Well Gina has had this boyfriend, a senior (Gina and I are sophomores), named… Hunter. He’s one of the most hilarious people I’ve met, hot, tall, and nice. Gina and Hunter started dating in December. I hung out with them a few days before, doing nothing, and had a good time, had no intentions to what was to come. He and I went through these periods of time where we would text, strictly as friends, nothing flirty at all. The last “period” we had, we were flirting like crazy. I don’t know why we did. Biggest regret. I’ve never done anything like this. He admitted he liked me after a few weeks of texting, all whilst still in love with Gina, my friend (Side-note: Gina is the most perfect girl in my grade. #1 in our class in academics(Other side-note: I am #8
), gorgeous, hilarious, and cute. Pretty much all the aspects you would want for a girlfriend.) I admitted I liked him, we hung out a few times in town with everyone, everyone completely underwraps about what was going on. It was exciting. All we did was kiss, once. Anyways, back to my dad. He told me he had cancer. It broke me. I was so upset about it. My dad’s my hero, it broke me. The only person I could turn to to seem who would help was Hunter. I told him when it happened, and that same mother fuckin week, Hunter ends things with me. Well, what a great week. I think about him all the freaking time. I liked him so much, I had never liked a boy like him. It’s crazy. Well, wala. That’s my story.
I don’t even care if anyone comments on this. I sure know I wouldn’t read all this shi t if it was me. Gracias.
7 comments
Comment by Christina on 06/30/2011 at 10:25 pm
Boys will be boys, you’ll have more come and go in your life. Friends come and go too, but family will always be in your life. I’m so sorry about your dad. Life sucks, I know. Pulls you down. Keep your head up high, look towards the positive. I’m a firm believer of miracles. I really do hope things do get better. I wish there was something I could do to help your dad. Enjoy the present, don’t lurk in the shadows of the past or the scary thought of the future.
I’m a sophomore too.
Comment by Ms.Chiffon on 06/30/2011 at 11:14 pm
interesting
Comment by Tumi how are you? on 06/30/2011 at 11:41 pm
I hope your dad gets well and that you get to love your mom.
Do you really think it’s spelled “walla”?
Comment by Father God on 06/30/2011 at 11:59 pm
Darlin, welcome to life. Curve balls get thrown at ya all the time. Its all part of growing up. And as for Hunter, you’ll find someone, it just takes time for you to find that special someone who means the world to you. Trust me, it took me 13 failed relationships and seven years to find that person.
Comment by Ally on 07/01/2011 at 12:26 am
Hello,
It is a great outlet to be able to pour out your story to strangers. And believe it or not, it’s not an unusual story at all. It’s just new for you and it’s happening to you. As you know, you don’t choose your parents,and Mom sounds like a loser, but she is your birth mom. So hopefully there are other adults who can be better support for you. Seek them out. Dad sounds neat. Now there are so many types of cancer, it’s not fatal as it once was, so Dad will have a life style change as he goes through treatments and faces life with a new outlook to it mortality.
Your dealings with your best friend’s boyfriend, well, it’s just not cool to hit with a guy who’s tied to your friend. Guys will come and go, but a strong friendship is more lasting and enduring. Your high school girl friends could be life long friends. So, anyway, you’ll have a lot more guys like him who want to kiss you and stuff. It very common, nothing earth shattering. Hating your life. No, you hate the emotions life is putting you through. Maybe keep a journal like you wrote here to get your feelings out. Then notice not every day is awful, only some. Some days may be pretty good days. How about that, that I read your whole story. See,others care. Thanks for reading all this.
Comment by Paul on 07/01/2011 at 1:18 am
Well first i think you should talk to hunter reguardless of if he likes you or not (u will get over him, theres a million other guys out there) and your only in high school so that always is a rough time. i think u should still talk to him because it seems like you need someone to turn to anyway and its better than not having anyone to talk to at all…If u feel like hunter has to like you because you tell him personal matters, it sometimes doesnt work that way..although it is a psychological fact that if you share personal matters with someone you will most likely become more fond of them. Nonetheless he is still someone to talk to and he will give you advice, people like to be listened to (i think its why they blog and stuff) but we are also very needy, everyone needs someone to talk to, a role model or whatever…hope i helped
Comment by Priscilla P on 07/01/2011 at 1:31 am
hahhah talk about story of my life. you should totally post this on fml.com lol. ok but on a serious note. I’m really sorry. though i dont think thats what you want to hear. it seems like alot to take in all at once. my christmas wish is that your dad will beat cancer. and i mean that. he sounds like a hero. and im sorry about your mom. sounds like she got lost a long time ago and now its just too late to help her. she oviously has a lot of problems. guys suck! hes an idiot and i hope u never even look at that duche again! what a loser. you deserve better than that. hahhah i dont care how popular you are. unless thats how we should introduce ourselves. hi i hung out with nobody, because i moved around like 500 times my whole life and made no friends yet everyone seemed to like picking on me. so tht was fun. so i geuss im not even up there with the losers. but i care about the beauty within. only because in the end thats what people remember. when you die. when you leave this earth. thats what you want to be remembered for. i would understand if you hated your life. no judgment here. thats pretty messed up. hahahh and i like long stories, so go right ahead write me a book. well i can say one thing. you cant choose your parents or you childhood but you can choose your own direction. You seem like a pretty strong girl. but its ok to ask for help. if you ever want to talk my email pittingtonp@aol im 18 btw and my name is priscilla best of luck, hahaha whether you just want to vent or actually looking for a penpal. hey look we both like to write books;D