He’s smoking cigarettes by himself in the garage at night…I understand experimenting with it and smoking with friends and whatever but it worries me that he feels the need to smoke at home. Our home situation has been really bad the past couple years, our dad left and our mom suffers from alcoholism and severe substance abuse. Should I just not do anything about it? My brother doesn’t know about my mom being a recovering junkie…but I can see him having the same tendencies to fall into an addiction. My mom would never notice by herself because she is currently too preoccupied with her own situation…so now I feel like it is up to me to either act…or not act.

My mother was born to an alcoholic abusive father and a codependent mother whose first child died as an infant three years before from Scarlet Fever. She felt unwanted and somehow responsible. Father could not keep job because of alcoholism and the family lived in poverty. She was deprived of basic needs as a child: Her mother confided in her as a friend and told her of her marital problems. She had no control over her environment. She was made to sleep in a baby crib until she was ten yrs. old. She was promised a bicycle, a toy, a pet, etc. every day by her father, but never received one. Father drank away all money. Her mother sent her into the local taverns to look for her father and bring him home. Her father left the family when she was 14 yrs. old and returned when she was 19 She developed into a beautiful woman with very large breasts which she hated. Family suspected her father of sexual abuse, but no action ws taken. She developed eating disorders. She married a man (my father) she didn’t love at age 22. Had botched breast reduction surgery & had all teeth extracted at approx. age 23-25. I was born when she was 29. My sister was born 9 years later. We both feel that she was, and continues to be, an extremely overbearing, controlling and emotionally abusive. parent. At age 82, she is severely depressed, verbally and emmotionally abusive, distrusting & domineering with fits of raging anger. She denies all aspects of her negative personality and blames others, primarily her children and ex-husband (my father left our family after 22 years of marriage), for personal strife, but idolizes parents, especially her mother and feels their parenting had no ill effects.

I am 52 years old and am trying to gain perspective and get closure so that I can move on with my life, but I am blocked. I know that I should just “let go and move on”, but I feel I need more understanding. Can someone shed light and help?

Okay, I do know that the LDS church is true. I totally believe it. But I look at porn sometimes and masturbate alot. Sometimes I watch gay stuff too, which makes me feel worse. I’m addicted. You’ll probably say ‘go to your bishop’ but I can’t cuz he’s my dad and he’s really strict. Someone please help, I’m really trying to stop.

my best friend and my boyfriend’s brother (20 and 23 respectively) are expecting their first child in six months. they have asked my boyfriend and i to be god parents. they fight all the time violently because of his excessive crack cocaine addiction. she keeps telling me that she is going to make him go to rehab, but the deadlines go by the wayside and she always gives it. i’ve tried to break it down to her and make her understand the seriousness of the situation, but nothing seems to work. is it of for me to tell her that i wont be the god mother if she doesn’t do what is best for her child? i am very flattered by the offer but i want what is best for her and the baby.

my dad has been an alcoholic for like 30 years, hes 53 now and all does is drinks all day everyday. he doesnt think he has a problem but me and family cant really talk to him about it because he will get mad and denie he has a problem, i dont know how long he can go on like this. i dont know how to talk to him about it. all i do is worry about him but i dont want to make him mad which i know will happen if i talk to him about it.

Im 18 now but when i was 16/17 he used drugs. Meth and weed. Smoked drank. He one time went crazy and attacked me and my mom. We called the cops and they took him away. We gave him another chance. Last year the day before thanks giving he went crazy again on his drug induce rage. and he started throwing all the stuff we baught for thanks giving at me and mom saying he hates us and never wants to see us. We left that night and i came back in the morning and he said he doesnt remember a thing? And also thru out his drug life he has been breaking stuff. Dishes, tvs and windows. Now my mom has finally fed up with it and is divorcing him. He said he is done with drugs. But i do not believe him. he is being nicer tho. Should i forgive him???? If u were in my place would u forgive him?

ok he called me from his second cell phone and months later i called it to find he gave it to his new g/f now the only reason i want to call is not to hurt the lady but, to help her out. he first off has ran from the law for a dui issue and 2nd he owes me 45000, dollars and his ex wife about the same amount plus he abused me and his ex too. plus he has not paid taxex in 6 years or so and another issue with the man is he was with me and her at same time when they frist got together and he called me on phone to tell me i broke my ancle and angel has to take care of me and i cant pay money to you for a few months get over it. is what the man said. i feel she has the right to know the truth and if she picks to stay so be it but at least she will know the scum he really is…..so should i or not tell her about him???
he never got caught cause he moved to nother state and i dont no the lady at all she has kids and he told me he dont like them too. i am only wanting to help her out. she knows nothing about him at all. the cops are to dumb i have gave his address to many times…….
it is not my father it is the father to my kids……my ex……

seriously

Clint Eastwood’s Anti-Drug PSA

after all the nasty things that happened in my life, like my best friend hating me, my crush doesn’t feel the same way about me, and my dear ol dad becoming an alcoholic, I’ve been experiencing alot of depression. but is it normal to be this hard on yourself ? is it normal to have a voice in the back of your head telling you all these nasty things that im beginning to believe is true ? these negative thoughts are starting to change my outlook at life.

My name is Vincent Valentine from Northern CA. For Years i have played the ordinary orangevale pony Leage baseball. But last year was wild, I have never played such advanced baseball in my life. Six Players dropped out of Travel Ball because the price was rising. So they came to Orangevale Pony league. The team i was on was the bronco red sox, 11 and 12 year olds playing this advanced league of baseball. At the time i was the younger part of the league, i had just turned 11, playing this league full of travel ball players. Our team got 2 of them. And one player on our team was an amazing player, and has a 9 out of 10 chance of making it to the mlb. He could throw 60-70mph and very accurate. No point of having out fielders when he is pitching. He could throw a curve, slider, knuckle curve, knuckle ball, screw ball, change up, you name it, and he could throw it. He hit the ball over the 250ft. fence by over 50ft. each time he made contact. But there was another amazing player named Jeff Martin. He could hit the ball just as far and pitch 70-75mph and can bring it up to 80mph and just as accurrate. Both of these amazing players were 12 years old at the time and are now 13 and defently USSSA ball players. They are both back on there travel ball teams. The problem is, i have no clue what team they are on. Its a very, very, very long story why i want to know. Any 13U or 14U ball players on a USSSA travel team, please help. They would be playing either AA or AAA division. I know Aaron Winter used to play on the Backyard Boys. His dad, Mike Winter was the coach. I know nothing about Jeff Martin, who played on the bronco A’s last year, with another amazing player with the last name Polin. Jeff Martin and Polin I think are together on the same travel team. They would be playing in the Sacramento Area teams. Or anywhere in Northern California. Thanks for your Help. Remember. Aaron Winter, Jeff Martin, and Polin.

I feel bad about putting all this out there, but I don’t know where else to turn. My mother is an alcoholic and has been for all my life–and majority of her own. I’ve heard a lot of stories that make me feel ashamed and embarrassed about how she was before I was born. She’d party a lot and she’d drink until she passed out, her ‘friends’ would take turns having sex with her and she would never know it. She drank while she was pregnant with me–and luckily, I don’t have any defects. She’s a good mom, does what any mother would for her kid and makes sure she goes to work but she still drinks.

I have very vague memories as a child of how I’d cry over my mom thinking she was dead any time I saw her sleeping longer than I thought normal–she was difficult to wake up. As I grew up, I realized that she wasn’t just sleeping, she ‘blacked out.’ I learned more about it and was able to tell that she was drunk. She’s a mean drunk.

She’ll start arguments, ridicule you over things that don’t make sense, call you names, and will even hit/shove you and she’ll deny it all in the end, wake up the next day and not remember it. She drinks before and after she goes to work, she tries to look like she doesn’t drink or smoke, but she’s not fooling anyone. She lost her sense of smell and taste from smoking.

During my childhood, I lived with my grandmother and by the time I was 12, my grandma told my mom she had to get out by the end of the month, but leave me behind–which was what I wanted. My grandma died not too long after she said that, so I was stuck with her regardless. So by 13-15, I had to live with her alone and she became more violent and drank constantly still. She hides boxes of wine under her bed, stashes beer cans, and keeps the taps like its a bottle cap collection. I moved out and went to live with my dad at 15 strictly because of her alcoholism, and (I’m 17 now)–whenever I come over to visit for the weekend, she still gets drunk.

She’ll refill her glass every time it gets low on wine or beer, making it look like she’s only had the one the entire time. She tries to hide it, but she doesn’t have a problem nor does she care to fix her habits. I’m really sorry that I made the detail a little too long or that it’s a ‘life story’ I don’t mean it to be–but I don’t know how to condense how bad it is.

We’ve tried everything. Councilling, Therapy, Psychiatrist, even a priest or two. She doesn’t listen to them, and she doesn’t listen to me. She doesn’t say she’s sorry, and no matter how obvious I make her drinking an issue, she thinks its me who has the problem. At the rate she drinks.. It affects her greatly. She’s no longer as smart as she used to be, her hair is thinning and falling out, and her teeth are rotting. She used to be gorgeous, lovely smile, black raven hair, with a natural gray streak(birthmark). She’s only 44! She’ll probably die at 50, I don’t know what to do.. any word of advice would really help.

Is honestly always the best policy for your kids… what do you think?

From my own personal experiences when something bad or embarrassing happens within a family… like say the father is going into rehab for alcoholism the mother might just tell the child/ren that “daddy is at work” or “daddy’s on vacation”.

Should you lie like this to your kids or put it in a way that they understand.. like say “daddy is sick and he needs to see the doctor to get better.”.. which is partially true since most kids don’t know anything about rehab and addiction.

What do you think about this?

I am a 13 year old female who is experiencing problems with an alcoholic father. Ever since my mother left he has been relying on drinks to make him happy.

Everyday when I come home from school my father is heavily drunk. He immediately yells at me for the most unimportant reasons, i.e.; (I am 1 or 2 minutes late because of the school bus) He will nag on for sometimes a whole hour, repeating himself over and over again, and strike me with his belt or shove me into a wall. He sprained our dog’s ankle last week when he was upset and pushed him down a flight of stairs.

It is obviously my parent’s house, not mine. I have no authority over my father’s actions, or his decisions to drink alcohol. I was just wondering if there is an appropriate way to confront my father about the issue, without abusing my privileges and overstepping my boundaries as a teenager.

I have no relatives to contact, as my father has isolated himself from the outside world, all of them have grown distant or given up completely

Alright, well, my brother is addicted to a game known as Dynasty Warriors 4. Its a good game and all, but he is obsessing over it. He plays it all the time, hes basically beat the game, he thinks its the best game ever, and he spends 2-5 hours playing it on my dads xbox 360. we have an xbox he can use to play it, but because the 360 has more memory, he plays the 360 more. we tried getting him to bring the xbox upstairs to play, but he wont, and usually cries when my dad kicks him off, and when he cries, he usually gets his way.

The xbox 360 is downstairs, and right when I wake up, I play NFS most wanted immediately to keep him from playing that annoying game.

So my question is this…

How in the hell do I keep him from playing Dynasty Warriors 4 all the time? He simply doesnt get it, he doesnt take a bath, he doesnt have friends, and all he does is eat, play games, and watch tv. did i mention eat?

please tell me how to get him to stop playing that damned game PLEASE!!!!!!!!
Uhh, bento? my parents know about this, but my family is the kind that lazes around all day, doesnt have a scheduel, doesnt know what everyones doing, and doesnt care what everyones doing. We eat when we’re hungry, and we dont eat as a family, ok? we make our own food, most of my family is fat, and im probably the only one who thinks thats a problem. I didnt ask if I should deal with it, I asked how do I solve it, so answer that question, my good friend.

She is a Mess! She drinks constantly….from Afternoon to evening.She is not working…my Dad died and left us kids money/Stocks/Bonds…she can’t get her hands on it…Thank-God….but ….she calls me and is always drunk…words slurred….emotional…crying….(Alcohol tears)….I’m tired of it!!!!!!!!! I’m sick of it!!!! I’m her brother….I do love her….very much….but losing patience….she wont work….because she is always hung-over….Her full-time job is Alcoholism/drugs….mostly alcohol……Please advise???? She is adopted….not sure if her mother or father was an alcoholic or mentally ill…i.e Bipolar????? I don’t think she is Bipolar….not sure….I’m a Registered Nurse….health care worker and Graduate student…

my dads an alcoholic and i cant take it anymore hes already ruined 16 years of my life what can i do to get away from him?

My mom is having an affair with a man that is quite frankly trash. I don’t want my siblings to be around people like that. I don’t know who he is and I’m sure she doesn’t know him like she thinks she does. When we try to tell her what type of person he is, she defends him! This man was at one point a meth addict. He is recovered so she says and holds a job so there is probably some truth to that. We know he does pills and she even defends him for that. For now she is staying with her mom but what is stopping her from taking my siblings to his place? And with the way our grandmother is, it’s not an enviroment I want them growing up in. I don’t want them believing anything my mom or grandmom does as ok. Futhermore, this is there home. As much stress as they’re going through, they shouldn’t have to switch schools or start over again. We are working hard on paying bills by ourselves and it’s been fine so far. Everything is pretty stable and it should stay that way for them. Is there any way to get financial assistance or aid so it is not so hard on us? And how does it look for us on getting the kids? There are no other real assets except for children. Any help is welcome! And thank you in advance.

He has a prior dui and has no intent on driving. His car is in storage and the storage bills are adding up He wants to get his car out of storage but w/ no license how does he get current tags and and insurance so I can drive it? Can he walk into dmv and get current tags w/ no license? And want about insurance? Any adivce I’m stuck. Also in the county I live your vehicle has to have current tags, plates ect, even if you are not driving it and it is parked in your home parking place. Really we kept my bro’s car for him why he was in Iraq, naturally the tags expired, the scottsdale police towed the car without notice from my own parking space in the condo complex I reside.

Like 5 years ago my sister bought a ouija bored and we always played with it. Ever since then we noticed things have just been plain bad around here. 4 years ago my grandpa passed away, then my sister broke up with her boyfriend after 4 years, this past summer my dog died of cancer, and the main reason im asking this question is because my sisters best friend just died and she was only 20. It was a sudden illness and she was like a sister to me and we all miss her. The weirdest part is, one night this friend and my sisters were using the ouija bored in my basement and then me and my dad scared them with a walkie talkie and they all came running upstairs crying. It made such aa good memory but now its freaky. Is it just acoincidencee or is the ouija board bringing us bad luck? How can we get it out of the house? Do we bury it? I cant deal with anymore deaths. Please help thanks